This entry is specially for acne sufferer like me

I'm not really one of those girls who always have a perfect looking, flawless skin. I do have my good skin days and bad skin days. However, my skin has never really been at its worst, until recently...thanks to my imbalance hormones! >_<

Just after I told you guys that I had almost 100% score for the skin test that I did with SK II last time, I developed kinda severe acne on my face! I don't know what happened. Maybe I was just really, really stressed out for the wedding.. (yes, say hello to this Bridezilla! :p) or maybe they've been there, underneath the skin actually, and something triggered them to come out, all at the same time! - I don't know whether it was the Clarisonic brush that I used like I told you guys last time...or what! But the acne just came out all of a sudden! Sekali keluar banyak-banyak pulak tu! My worst case everrrrrrrr! I never had this kind of pimple before! It's just SO weird...and ugly...and sad. However I do think that this is more like a "disease" or hormonal acne or something. Cuz it's not like my usual once-a-month-PMS case...Sigh. Hormonal acne is a whole new beast, I tell you! :(

My pimples were so bad and my period was irregular too. My hormones were unstable I suppose. In just one month time, my face become from that clear, acne-free skin...to really bad severe acne on my face! :( It was SO bad that I always locked myself up in the room, not wanting to go out and face people! I had to cancel events, cancel going here and there, cancel appointments, cancel doing what I'm supposed to do, etc. Just because I just want to avoid seeing people. I even tried to avoid seeing my own family! Always locked myself up in my room! Yes...it was thaaaaat bad! I was always moody and sad. To be honest, I was so depressed.

Seriously, I had a reaallllly hard time dealing with it. What's more when no one is giving you hope, and all you hear is negative words from them. Thank God my darling didn't mind with it.. But still, can you imagine, coming down to eat your dinner or sahur, and hearing your family talk about your acne, look at them and made you feel bad about yourself for having acne? Every time you sit in front of them with a bare face, just makes it even harder when their eyes can't stop looking at your acne when they're talking to you... And then the stress of going out to meet your friends or even strangers pulak, and they came up to you and said, "what happened/is wrong with your face?" Sighhh... 

Ok, I know those people who asked meant well, and worried about me. But imagine the stress I had to handle and to deal with! - The pain from having the acne is one story, the pain of looking at yourself in the mirror with that ugly bumps and redness is another story... And the pain of hearing people talk about it as if YOU DON'T KNOW IT ALREADY...is yet another story!!! T__T

I now understand the feelings of those acne sufferers. I'm with you darlings.. :(

God...I hate pimples. I feel so insecure. I understand deeply for whoever has had pimple problems..and really hate those people who thinks that making fun of it is funny. Because it's not. It really is not! Hmm..I guess, this is a test that God gave me..to remind me to always be thankful and take a good care of His creations and to not always be proud of what I have or anything like it...because actually everything you own in this world belongs to Him, not you. He only lends you his wealth or beauty or health or whatever. And He can take it back anytime He wants. So I guess this test was more like a reminder for me, I think? Although I don't think I was proud last time. I was more like.........happy, I think? But oh well.. whatever. Things has happened now. But after two months, I'm quite surprised that I wasn't as depressed as I used to be. Probably cuz I kinda get used to my face being inflamed already. Heck, it has been 2 months that I live like this! Or probably because I have accepted this test that God gave me with an open heart, and have accepted my flaws...and have agreed that God can take anything within a few seconds. Saya terima. Saya redha dengan ujian ini.  =/ (So okayyy God....I have understand it and learnt my lesson...errr...so can you heal me up already? heheh :p)

I have gone to the clinic by the way...to get help. It has been about two months that I'm on medication. As of now, my skin hasn't really recovered fully. But it's getting there, inshaallah. It's better than 2 weeks ago. I don't have that many bumps like I did, a month ago. Just maybe 2 or 3 more bumps to cure. But....I do have acne marks on the skin which is yet to heal in time. The doctor said, my acne is the kind that's quite hard to cure compare to the other types of acne. - By saying hard, she meant it'll take longer time to heal. Sigh... Because my acne is inside the skin. It doesn't wanna come out, and it doesn't wanna go and disappear either. It just stays there. So the doctor gave me some medicines for the acne to come out. As of now I'm at the stage where I need to heal my acne marks that I have on my skin.. I have quite some red marks on my cheeks... (Sorry, I won't show my naked face, before and after picture. Because like I said, it hasn't cleared yet. Maybe when I get back my normal skin again (inshaallah), I'll do the post in detail! So if you wanna know exactly how I treat my acne problem, please pray for a fast recovery for me! hehe)

My pimples were kind of like this one! Scary, no? :(

[image: googled]

...and now it's sort of like this picture. The healing stage..where there's some red marks on the skin

So anyways, like all the dermatologists/skin doctors in the world, I was forbidden from wearing any make up while I'm on the treatment. Except for mineral make up, as I was told by my very own skin specialist. Of course I knew that. I knew make up is not really good for the skin. I don't even like depending on make up too, actually. But since we're living in the world where some people would judge you based on how you look, sometimes you need those extra help to cover your imperfections! Not because you wanna be fake or be/look like someone else or anything like that. But because you just wanna look and feel good about yourself, so you can have a little confidence and be happy with life. Especially for people that is not perfect like me..

So with this Raya festive, you'll meet a lot of people during open house events - friends, family, relatives, etc, and I'm sure many of us imperfect ladies, wanna look perfect or almost perfect if we can, in front of those people, right? - Cuz like it or not, people tend to judge based on your look. They would look at you and sneer if you don't look like they do or if you have something that is not quite right according to their eyes. So how else can you hide your imperfect face, other than wearing make up..right? (Plastic surgery is another story la, ok? hehe)

Anyway, the picture below is my recent Raya picture. You see those red spots on my cheeks? This is after 2 months of treatment from my doctor...the acne bumps isn't really showing up here, thanks to the antibiotics and steroids pills I took. But I do still have some red marks/acne marks that is quite hard to cover even with my make up! - Will share my meds and topical products for my acne in another post.

Look, it is still visible even after I have covered them with my full coverage foundation + powder! Some of you might say that it doesn't look that bad like how I explained/told you earlier in this post. But bear in mind, I wore thick powder in here...and this is after 2 months of treatment, and my cheeks are actually burning red without the make up on! :(

And I gotta say, I put quite a lot of powder there to cover them...but they still show up! So imagine if I don't have any make up on to cover them?! Imagine how red my face actually is! 

T____T

(Whoever invented make up is a genius! God bless you. hehehehe)

For some, wearing make up might mean that you're being fake as you're not exposing the real you...or worse, some narrow minded people would think that wearing make up means you're an attention seeker and calling them vain and give them names or whatsoever it is that they try to put you down, when really..it's just a resentful cover for their own ineptitude and lack of action to make themselves look better. Pffft - Maybe yes, if it's too much. And yes I have to agree, that there are some women who wear makeup which also happen to be vain and attention-seeking, but that's a really different story altogether.  I'm talking about those women who complain about how they look, but yet do nothing about it! And worse, trying to put others down who look good, just to make themselves feel better. Sigh.... What is wrong with the world laa.. huhu. Anyhow, I just don't see anything wrong with wearing make up, if you just wanna have a little confidence by enhancing the way you look!

Like for me, in this case...wearing make up is like my shield, my savior and my protector.. from those cruel people who judged me based on my flaws.. I never really appreciate make up until I got this test from God. I know it's bad for the skin but...I really can't help it. I need to hide them whenever I meet anyone. Yesss...anyone! Even mom, or dad..or even Mr. Fiance - although they already seen the real bumps and redness.. haha. And although my fiance actually didn't mind at all and always say that he loves me for who I am, not because of my look or anything - But I still didn't believe him as I think he just wanna make me feel good about myself (cuz he's a darling like that), and I'm a worrier who worries about anything and everything. haha. - So I just didn't feel comfortable to let myself out there...to anyyyy one especially to the ones I love/who knows me. The feelings of looking into your beloved eyes, and knowing that they say things like "..your face has changed a lot. Poor you" in their thoughts and in their mind, is a bit melancholy and depressing for me. So yes, wearing make up is the answer for me when I'm going out to meet people! Otherwise, just stay at home/your room and slap on some colored acne cream that would stay on the skin (I don't like the absorbed kind!), so the mom won't be so worried and nag at me when looking at my horrible inflamed skin! 

Oh gosh..I have typed quite long already regarding my acne story. Hee..I just realized this! ;p Now I want to share with you; the acne sufferers, who want to look good and gain back your confidence..even if it's just temporary! Yes, there is still hope..although it's not a permanent solution, but this is how I do to hide my imperfections! - Hey...at least there's a way to minimize our misery, right?! hehe. I know as we're in the midst of healing our skin, we're not supposed to do this often. So what I'm about to share with you now is for you to do it on emergency days. OK? But for those who is not really an acne sufferer/undergoing treatment like me, but has some little imperfections that you wanna correct, this trick would do just fine for you! Be it freckles, redness, moles, dark circles, etc!

Remember those days when we were in art class in school, our teacher used to teach us what are the primary colors and which color to mix with what color to get a certain color? Remember those days? Now...try to apply that on your red face! - Green is made up of two primary colors; blue and yellow. While red and blue mixed together gives you purple. Yellow added to purple gives you BROWN - or light brown/beige in this case when you mix a green concealer with a beige/yellow concealer, which is the kind of tone you're looking for when you're concealing your redness on your skin!

Corrective color palette basically follow the simple rule of ‘neutralizing’ an opposite color on the skin and then hiding it to match the respective skin tone just as in a Color Wheel where we learn last time in school...to get to where the color opposite to a particular shade that neutralizes it! These concealers usually come in various colors ranging from the natural skin tone color to colors like green and purple.

A color like yellow/beige helps to tone down and even out the skin tone. However, it does not ‘hide’ anything specifically which is why we need other colors to do the hiding work! Like purple or green for example!

So apart from the natural skin tone color concealers, the colors available in the cosmetics market are: White, Beige, Yellow, Orange, Mint Green, Light Green, Lavender Purple, Mauve, Light Blue, Pink and Light Peach. My personal favourite to do the hiding work would be the green and the purple one!

Just for your info:

• White: Used with Beige to cover up heavy under eye dark circles. 
• Beige: Used to conceal slight shadows and brighten up the complexion and under eye area. Used with White to conceal heavy under eye dark circles and around the nose area to conceal slight shadows. 
• Yellow and Orange: Neutralizes redness and brown discoloration. Used to conceal red blemishes, bruises and tone down any redness on the face near the nose, lip area, cheeks etc and on brown spots. Orange helps to neutralize the blue toned under eye dark circles and purple bruises. 
• Mint/Light Green: Neutralizes redness as well. If the redness is too dark, mint/light green is used with/without yellow to neutralize it. Works the same as the Yellow concealer except only on darker red spots and scars. 
• Lavender Purple: Used to neutralize yellow-colored bruises or imperfections, yellow under eye or cheek area due to an illness/flu etc on bronze-olive skin tones. 
• Mauve: Used to cover up dark/black spots and visible veins on the face. 
• Light Blue: Used to neutralize orange spots, tan lines/spots, age spots and freckles. 
• Pink: Used to conceal dark gray shadows just below puffy under eye dark circle area and and shadows around the nose. 
• Light Peach: Used to brighten up olive skin tones and balance out slight color discolorations. Can be used for slight coverage of blue veins.

So for this Raya...I hide my redness and inflamed skin with some mineral make up. My doctor said, if I really have to wear make up while under her treatment, she suggested me to wear a mineral make up at least. And so I did!

So this is what I used. All mineral-base make up..
I didn't have the colored concealer palette like I showed you above though. But I do have a green colored make up base from Vacci, a Korean brand make up. The best part of this green colored liquid is that it's easy to blend with the skin. It's not really a "concealer" actually, but rather a make up base! So the texture is really nice and dewy, unlike the normal concealer palette where it is quite dry. And oh, Vacci is a mineral make up brand too! I bet my doctor would approve this brand as well! hehehe
(I didn't use their foundation because their foundation that I have with me is a little too fair for my skin..that I can only apply a bit on my face, otherwise I'll look like a ghost! - I need to apply a thick amount of liquid to hide my imperfections, remember? hehe. Plus, I needed a beige/yellowy tone to cover the redness too)

So anyways..just letting you know that mineral make up generally contains less chemical-based ingredients such as parabens, binders, artificial oils, talc, preservatives, synthetic dyes and fragrances, which can help eliminate some of the skin problems. That was why my doctor said it's okay to wear mineral make up if I really need to wear one. Another major benefit of wearing a mineral make up is that it generally does not clog the pores, allowing the skin to "breathe" naturally. As such, it is less likely to aggravate an acne condition or cause flare-ups! - Which is great for people like me who is undergoing a treatment, no? hehee

So how do I wear it?

I pumped my beige foundation and my green liquid make up base side by side onto my hand...and I mix them up!

I like to put my concealer on my hand first rather than applying it straight to my face...so I can figure out how much liquid I actually need on my face, so I won't overdo it.

Mix until you get your perfect color that can hide your redness!

Just like working with a normal concealer, after applying the corrective concealer on the spots, set it with powder..

Check whether you have blend the color well or if you need to add more..

Here's a before and after I used the normal beige concealer (left) 

And after I have mixed the beige color with green liquid (right)

The redness appearance is reduced a bit! ;)

Awesome product!!

Now..get yourself the three major colors you need to have on your make up table. You never know when you might need it! You can purchase it here!

NOTE: Under eye dark circles come under blue, purple and brownish tones.. therefore they are neutralized by yellow or beige.


Hope this helps you ladies out there who are struggling with concealing those tough under eye dark circles and red blemish/scar marks.

Happy concealing girls! And happy visiting to your relatives house this weekend! Selamat Hari Raya! ;)



XOXO,
Shazzy.